These are the 10 oldest jokes in human history and they prove that people have been laughing abo

Publish date: 2024-05-20
Updated

In 2008 a group of historians from the UK were commissioned to unearth the oldest joke ever written down.

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The study was led by humor expert Dr Paul McDonald from the University of Wolverhampton.

The list reveals that humor has changed a lot in some respects, McDonald said in a statement released when the study was first published.

"Jokes have varied over the years, with some taking the question and answer format while others are witty proverbs or riddles," he said. "What they all share, however, is a willingness to deal with taboos and a degree of rebellion."

And as the world's oldest joke shows, toilet humor is here to stay.

10. A joke about a haircut, Ancient Greece, 300-400 AD.

The moon rises above the statue of the ancient Greek god Poseidon in Ancient Corinth near Athens on August 11, 2022. Valerie Gache/AFP via Getty Images

The 10th oldest joke was found in the world's oldest 'joke book.' It's a fourth-century text called "Philogelos" (or "Laughter-Lover"), and is attributed to ancient Greeks Hierocles and Philagrius.

"Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: 'In silence.'"

9. One about a donkey, Ancient Greece, 300-400 AD.

A donkey stands on the roadside on the island of Rhodes, Greece on June 27, 2021. Emmanuele Contini/NurPhoto via Getty Images

Also from "Philogelos," the ninth oldest joke in the world goes like this:

"Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food."

"When the donkey died of hunger, he said: 'I've had a great loss! Just when he had learned not to eat, he died'."

8. An ancient "your mom" joke, Ancient Rome, between 63 BC to 14 AD.

A sculpture of the head of Emperor Augustus on displayed in Rome, June 14, 2016. Fabio Frustaci/AP Photo

"The Emperor Augustus was touring the Empire, when he noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself.

"Intrigued, he asked: 'Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?'

"'No, your Highness,' the man replied, 'but my father was.'"

7. A sex joke, Ancient Egypt, 30 BC.

The stepped pyramid at Sakkara, Giza, Egypt. Stefan Lippmann/Oneworld Picture/Universal Images Group via Getty Images

"Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey. His purse is what restrains him."

6. A joke that is also a riddle, Ancient Greece, 429 BC.

A statue of Sophocles in Hanover, northern Germany, October 20, 2009. Joerg Sarbach/AP Photo

In "Oedipus Tyrannus," by Greek playwright Sophocles, a character gives the following line, which is less of a joke and more of a brainteaser.

"Question: What animal walks on four feet in the morning, two at noon and three at evening?

"Answer: Man. He goes on all fours as a baby, on two feet as a man and uses a cane in old age."

5. A pun on a name, Ancient Greece, 800 BC.

Polyphemus the Cyclops having his eye put out by Odysseus and his companions, on a vase found in an Etruscan tomb. CM Dixon/Print Collector/Getty Images

In Homer's "The Odyssey" — written 2,800 years ago — Odysseus indulges in some dark humor.

"Odysseus tells the Cyclops that his real name is 'Nobody.'"

"When Odysseus instructs his men to attack the Cyclops, the Cyclops shouts: 'Help, Nobody is attacking me!'

"No one comes to help."

4. A joke about an old married couple, Unknown, 1100 BC.

Stock image Getty Images

"A woman who was blind in one eye has been married to a man for 20 years.

"When he found another woman he said to her, 'I shall divorce you because you are said to be blind in one eye.'

"And she answered him: 'Have you just discovered that after 20 years of marriage?'"

3. A joke about livestock, Sumeria, 1200 BC.

Bas-relief depicting cows and oxen at the Necropolis of Saqqara, Egypt. DeAgostini/Getty Images

This one from Sumeria in 1200 BC is another brainteaser.

"Three ox drivers from Adab were thirsty: one owned the ox, the other owned the cow and the other owned the wagon's load.

"The owner of the ox refused to get water because he feared his ox would be eaten by a lion; the owner of the cow refused because he thought his cow might wander off into the desert; the owner of the wagon refused because he feared his load would be stolen.

"So they all went.

"In their absence the ox made love to the cow which gave birth to a calf, which ate the wagon's load.

"Problem: Who owns the calf?"

2. Another sex joke, Ancient Egypt, 1800-1600 BC.

A felucca on the Nile river, Aswan, Egypt. Reinhard Dirscherl/ullstein bild via Getty Images

The world's second oldest joke was found in the Ancient Egyptian story book known as the Westcar Papyrus, written some time between 1800-1600 BC. 

It goes:

"How do you entertain a bored pharaoh?

"You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish."

1. A fart joke, Sumeria, 1900 BC.

An ancient Sumerian tablet with cuneiform writing, recording barley distribution, from Mesopotamia, modern-day Iraq, dating to around 3100–2900 BC. Sepia Times/Universal Images Group via Getty Images

"Something which has never occurred since time immemorial ..."

"A young woman did not fart in her husband's lap."

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